Fellow Yuseis
by ASteadfastHeartofGold
Summary: Derpfic one-shot. Pure Crack. The bartender shrunk back into his work as the motorcyclist finished half of that glass on the spot.   "So. Any Reasons why there's three of me?"


The shit that comes out of my head when I'm sick, man...

* * *

At a bar in the suburbs of New Domino, a motorcyclist put a glass down. A tiny bit of the white substance he drank left within.

"Refill, please!" Another one called as the bartender walked over with a freshly opend carton.

"This is the second carton, guys!" The bartender said as he filled up two of the glasses. The third motorcyclist who has barely said anything this entire time had yet to finish his second glass.

"Does it look like we give a shit?" Said the first. The bartender shrunk back into his work as the motorcyclist finished half of that glass on the spot.

"So. Any Reasons why there's three of me, fellow Yuseis?"

"Well. I'm the dub, and this guy is the sub."

"Hello."

"That must leave you as the Abridged series?" Sub looked over at Dub, and Dub sighed.

"I'm not exactly embraced by the fanbase. Nor are the other dubs. We're said to suck, and the Abridged Series pokes fun at all of our faults."

"Ah. I see."

"So." Said the Abridged, "What's the big difference? Aren't all of you washed up Rock Stars?"

"What?" Sub said, taken aback.

"Yeah, I don't think so." Dub clarified, face full of wtf. "I'm a turbo duelist."

"Oh, you gotta be kidding me, you actually duel on your bikes?"

Sub nodded as Dub just plain old said 'Yes'. Abridged headesked. "Ugh."

"But explain the washed-up Rock Star thing." Dub asked.

"Team Satisfaction?"

The other Yusei's perked up in attention.

"Rock Star band."

Dub fell back out of his stool.

"The Team Satisfaction name was to try and have the gayest band name ever."

Sub still clung to his shit as Dub got up.

"But-!"

Dub held his head from the landing. "Seems these differences are big parts of our lives."

"Moreover our _entire_ lives." Abridged stated.

Sub nodded, and that statement made Dub, who was tapping his finger on the side of his glass, which was half empty, decided to ask a needed question.

"So what split New Domino from Satellite for you guys?"

"Neo Domino?" Sub asked.

"Yeah I guess..." This is where the differences started getting to their heads; causing minor headaches.

"Z-Zero Reverse..." he hesitated.

"Hey, me too!"

"The dub left the fact that Sub lost his dad?" Abridged asked, his face showing how he couldn't believe that.

"What? No. My Dad vanished."

"Yours-?" Sub's eyes went wide, pings of jealousy and pain going through him.

"Yep."

"...Your father might still be alive..."

"I doubt I'll see him though. Other than the visions I get."

"You get those, too?"

"Hate to interrupt, but."

The other Yuseis turned to their counterpart. Sub grabbed his milk.

"Jack was the one who blew up the city."

"...How?" Dub said, jumping the gun.

"By checking his unplugged mic."

Sub spit his milk out in the most glorious spit take _ever. _His shit? _Gone. _

Dub was completely floored for a second, before banging his head on the table.

"BUT-! _HOW?_" Sub shouted. Suddenly Abridged straightened up his back with his eyes wide and then bent over the table, letting out some sort of moan.

"What was that...?" Dub asked, his head still on the table.

"I came."

"What?" Dub asked, being the innocent bitch by censorship. Sub however, from all the porn he got from his local fandom, understood well and blushed as he continued to be shocked.

"I-I-I-I-I-!"

"Heh. Don't worry little guy. I've got a medical condition where anything can do that to me."

"Wh-What does most of the time...?"

"Riding my girlfriend."

"Girlfriend...?" Asked Sub.

"Akiza, right?" Sub turned to Dub, wondering why he called Aki that.

"I'm talking about _my bike, _godamnit!" Abridged hissed, obviously tired of that accusation.

"S-Sorry..." Sub apologized for Dub.

"Yeah, what he said!"

The Yusei's held an awkward silence before the TV nearby shouted Jack's name. Sub and Dub turned their heads and looked.

"ONE, TWOO THREEEEE-"

Boom and static.

"..." Sub didn't even know what was going on anymore. Dub had an eyebrow raised and just went back to tapping his milk.

Abridged just sat and sighed, wanting to ride his 'girlfriend'.

Dub was hating himself due to creating this monster to his far right.

And sub? Secretly having a mental breakdown of gratefulness he was lucky compared to his counterparts.

All three raised their hands, and called out;

"One tall glass of milk go, please!" Abridged's being a 'wine bottle of milk', however.

Milk is the replacement of Alcohol for _all _Yuseis. The only thing they really had in common.


End file.
